saltwatersteve.com/travel

OK, I feel like I need to be honest about this. This may come as a shock to many, although some may have had their suspicions. I couldn’t think of a perfect way to tell everyone, so I made this post. I hope you understand.

My first clue was when I looked through the fabric at our tailor shop in Hoi An, Vietnam, and none of them were compelling enough to get shirts made. I was convinced that this was something for Meghan to enjoy and I might get some shirts made if it worked out, but it wasn’t working out. Meghan had picked out some fabric for pants and a shirt, which was a relief to us both because we didn’t think we’d pick a tailor so quickly, nor would Meghan decide what she wanted so quickly, and was therefore basically done with her shopping experience. I, as it turned out, had just begun mine.

We ended up spending the rest of the day going from tailor shop to tailor shop, looking at all of their fabrics (very quickly sometimes) and moving on. So many of them seemed the same after a while. There were a few that were really upscale and had nice fabrics but they wanted $50 (yes that’s US dollars) for one shirt so we gave them a big miss. Finally I bought 1.5 meters (enough for a short sleeve) from one shop for $12. Then I was able to show the other shops an example of what I was looking for. Most just shook their heads and seemed to indicate that, no, they didn’t have anything like that (which was the conclusion I was independently coming to as well).

One shop had a cool fabric that I wanted to buy, but once they cut it, I noticed the cut piece had quite a bit of stains on it. Think rust color stains on white fabric. Noting my displeasure with this, they tried the “oh, it no problem, easy to clean, etc. etc.” story, so I gave them the “yes, it’s no problem for me, because you are going to clean it - not me” story. They wanted a deposit, which I refused to pay. Instead I asked them when it would be clean and told them I will be glad to pay them the agreed upon $8 once I see that it is clean. They said to be back tomorrow morning at 10:00 AM. Like I needed to put the AM part in that last sentence. Really necessary.

Blah Blah.

Finally we stumbled upon a shop right on the main drag of town (surprising because they all look the same) that had some really cool stuff. So I bought 1.5 meters of each and we cruised back to B’Lan (our tailor) to order the shirts. They took my measurements and we discussed pockets, hem, collar, back pleats, etc. Lots of decisions go into just making a simple man’s short sleeve shirt, I found out. I guessed at most of these, however for the collar, I knew I wanted the kind where you can insert the little plastic flat spikey thing to help make your shirt look like the collar had been pressed when it had actually just come from the dryer. Scandalous.

Pedaled back towards the hotel. (Did I mention we rented bikes to get around? It is cool and a lot of places have these nice new Chinese single-speed cruisers that are comfy and stable, and for $1 for a day, I consider it a must-do.) Anyway, on the way back to the hotel, I realized that I really wanted a long sleeve shirt that had the cuffs (French?) that you can put cuff links in because I have never had that and I thought that would be cool. So back to B’Lan. They all laughed at me because they thought I had just come back for the dried sugared coconut they have laying out for snacking on (which I swear must have crack frosting because there is some truth to their joking - I must have eaten a pound of it already today). So I picked out a nice fabric (they have a great selection of more dressy stuff) and spec’ed out the shirt I wanted and the price was going to be $11. Not bad for a custom tailored shirt w/ French cuffs. Oh, in case you’re wondering, the price for the tailoring if you BYOFabric was $5 per shirt for a short sleeve.
So that puts my garment count at 4, Meghan is still at 2. Granted her pants cost $35 but that isn’t what this is about. I think.

So we were to come back at 5 PM the following day to have our first fitting. Sounds like we’re getting wedding dresses, eh?

So fast-forward to the next morning. We swung by B’Lan early (we were supposed to meet a friend there) and two of my fabrics were sitting on the table, uncut. Hmmm… Apparently yours truly did not take into consideration the WIDTH of the fabric. It is true that 1.5 m is enough length if the fabric is also 1.5 m wide! But the two I got from the same store on the main drag had been from 110 cm looms. Crisis indeed. 2 shirts is not enough when I had my hopes up for 4.

So it was back to that place to get more fabric. 40 more cm at 110 cm wide was the magic number. She still had it (no surprise there) and understood and I didn’t check the math (since I was in no position to argue) but I’m pretty sure I paid more per cm for these small pieces than I did the previous day. Then it was time to meet up with the place that was “cleaning” my fabric at 10 AM. I got there and the girl I dealt with the previous day was nowhere to be found. I tried to explain the situation to the girl who was there and she got on the phone to call her sister. She showed up about 5 minutes later and it was a bunch of “sorry, sorry, I forgot” but then later her story changed to “I clean but it didn’t work”. OK. Bye.

Back to B’Lan with the necessary fabric. No problem, come back at 5 for the fitting. That’s right - same day. And that’s what happened. No stories, no sorries - the shirts were ready at the time they were supposed to be and the price was firm. The shirts were (are) great! Oh yeah, and Meghan’s pants needed some minor alterations but they hadn’t gotten the shirt done yet (but I don’t think that was supposed to be done at 5 anyway). So come back tomorrow and see them at 11:00 AM.

So on the way the next day, I decided to get ANOTHER French-cuff shirt made, this time with a blue striped fabric but wanted the cuffs and collar done in plain white. With the insert thingys in the collar and the cuffs for cuff-links. Perhaps I’m being redundant. Price was the same, $11 and they could have it ready tonight. Good thing because we leave tomorrow.

Geez, this post is turning into a novel.

Meghan’s stuff needed one more slight change, and it would be ready this afternoon, so we pedaled to the nearby beach and had a nice lunch by the river on the way back. Her stuff was ready and fit great. Later that day I picked up my 2nd long sleeve shirt and it was nice. Meghan really liked how it looked and so did I. Garment count - Meghan: 2, Steve: 5!

So what does this have to do w/ coming out of the closet. Well, I suppose, after this experience, I can now say:

I am (a) metro-sexual. For those of you unfamiliar with this term, I found a link for you: http://encarta.msn.com/dictionary_701707420/metrosexual.html

I hope everyone accepts my new identity like I have. Don’t worry: Meghan and I are still together. We have decided to wait to see how this affects our relationship. I’m sure it will come down to some compromise like she does the yard work if I shop for clothes or something like that.